Today I caught myself mom shaming. No, it wasn’t the mom on her cell phone. It wasn’t even the mom digging in the diaper bag while her little darling licked the trash can. It was me. While I changed my son’s diaper in the bathroom at the zoo I saw several moms in there with their small children. Then out of the stall closest to me comes a mom and little boy probably the same age as Wyatt. He was probably going potty on the potty. Or maybe not. Maybe she was having issues too but I have no way of knowing. But I could not help feeling embarrassed that my son was still having a diaper changed at this age.
This potty training journey has been interesting to say the least. For the longest time we were not pushing the issue really hard. Wyatt would occasionally use the potty for the correct reasons rather than giving his toys a bath. We were happy with that, since it seemed like he totally got the whole idea. It seemed to be going well. Then it all stalled. I read that could be normal and not to freak out. But by the time going potty on the potty came around again he was no longer interested. We would have the occasional number 2 on the potty where we would all celebrate by dancing and he always went number 1 in the potty before bath time and sometimes in the morning. But on a daily basis, he could care less.
We tried the sticker reward program. One sticker for number 1, two stickers for number 2. That worked for like 2 days. When I asked him, “Don’t you want to earn more stickers by going potty?” He replied, “That’s ok.” and sometimes, “No thanks.” Then we would ask him if he wanted to be able to potty in the potty like daddy and mommy and he replied with the same answers. Although he showed much ambivalence toward the potty, we just told ourselves that at some point he would care. Until then, more diapers.
Some time later… while trying yet again to get Wyatt to tell us he needed to go number 2 before he actually went, he said, “I can just go in my diaper and you can change it.” Oh no he didn’t!! Of course I replied to that, “Well, mommy can’t change your diaper forever. You have to be a big boy and go on the potty.” To which the little darling replied, “I don’t want to be a big boy. I want to stay little.” Touche.
These are seriously his arguments. He has no interest in growing up and going potty on the potty. He cares not for dirty diapers on his bum. This child will more likely than not walk around with poo stuck to his bum for hours without a care. He could care less about any reward system. We even tried chocolate, Wyatt’s absolute favorite, as a reward for going potty. That lasted one, single time, then he was over it. “Give them to daddy” he said. Sigh. What to do.
We even tried letting him stay naked for the day. Thinking that he would for sure make it to the bathroom in time. It actually did work for number one. But oh my gosh if he didn’t stand in the kitchen, completely straight-faced and let a huge turd just fall right out of his bum. When I asked him why he did that, he really had NO ANSWER for me, except “I don’t know”. I asked him if he knew that he had to go poo and he said yes. So I guess we will not be trying that again anytime soon!
I have not tried just putting underwear on him and letting him pee himself. So many people have said this may be the way. But, this seriously scares me. Not to mention the fact that we are on the road with limited access to washers and dryers at times and all the wet and dirty underwear and pants and seats and carpet and who knows what else. And I am pretty sure that he would care less. I can see it now. Wyatt pees his new underwear, it runs down his leg into a puddle on the floor. Instead of saying eww, he will say to himself, Oh look a puddle for my dinosaurs to play in! Then I will have pee pee underwear, pants, floor and dinosaurs to clean up. Along with more little poop nuggets trailing behind him, I’m sure.
I know it will all happen in time. We really shouldn’t be in a rush. I guess. It is frustrating though when it seems you are the last one to accomplish something. I hear boys are harder to potty train than girls. Even if that’s not true, I am going to go ahead and hang on to that idea. For comfort.